Mestikah pengakhirannya sebegini? eewSsicnarFrehtsE

Di manakah silap tutur kataku?
Di manakah salah perbuatanku?
Sehingga aku diperlakukan sebegini,
Sehingga aku menghina diri...

Aku dikejutkan dengan berita itu,
Kau bakal dijodohkan kepada aku,
Mula2, aku meronta ingkar,
kemudiannya aku....aku jatuh cinta.

Semenjak bermula persahabatan kita,
ternyata memang kau wanita yang berbeza,
Kau sorokkan berita itu,
bahawa kau bakal isteriku.

Bergolak sudah pemikiran aku,
Goyah sudah pendirian aku,
Tak pernah kusangka jodohku begini,
Sebegitu sempurna hati,budi pekerti.

Kau penuhi segala permintaan hatiku,
Namun otakku mula bercelaru,
Ku takut kau akan berpaling dariku,
Aku tegar mahu memiliki dirimu.

Hari kepada malam, Minggu kepada bulan,
Ternyata berputik sudah sebuah hubungan,
Tetapi aku, rakus maju ke hadapan,
memaksa dirimu membuat keputusan.

Kau kuncikan sebuah jawapan,
Belajar dahulu, cinta kemudian,
Aku buta dengan jawapanmu itu,
Aku memaksamu mencintai diriku.

Ternyata aku melulu di situ,
Kau mula menghindari aku,
Hilang sudah sebuah cinta,
Masing2 mula berburuk sangka.

Aku terus cuba menebus diri,
Hadiah? Wang? sanggup ku beri,
Namun kau bukan wanita begitu,
Kau tak putus hampakan usahaku.

Kini penyakit menghantui diriku,
tetapi wajahmu masih di igauanku,
Semakinku berkali melawan ajal,
Semakinku rindukan kita sewaktu awal.

Tidakku jadikan sakitku sebagai alasan,
Untuk membuatmu penuh sesalan,
Ku masih mengharapkan cinta darimu,
Bukan ehsan, simpati dan syahdu.

Tidak pernah aku sebegini,
menagih cinta dan mencaci diri,
sebegitu pentingnya dirimu padaku,
walaupun kau terus dingin terhadapku,

Aku masih tidak mengalah,
Walau nafasku sudah bercampur darah,
Aku yakin "kita" akan berlaku,
kerana ku tahu kau sayang diriku.

Kau sering memuji nilai2 yang kumiliki,
yang setiakan agama dan mengagungkan cinta suci,
Tetapi apakah lagi yang kau ingini?
Mestikah pengakhirannya sebegini?

True Pain

 

Nobody will ever understand this pain,
not my comrades nor my closest friend.

Screw the saying, "no pain, no gain",
I gave and tried, just to be hurt again.

 

Little sunshine and little rain,
this gloom of hurt can never end,
Game of flirting, game of lust,
there's no such thing as; hearts not crushed.

I have been part of those games too,
juggling hearts and lovers through.
But in the end, I am still blue,
searching for, a love which is true.

 

 

Little love and little heart,
never came and be of my part.
Howls of lone wolf in the night,
answers all of my deepest fright.

 






 

Good things comes to those who wait,
to me, this phrase does not relate.
Time is playing against my fate,
Once you realized, it might have been too late.










My eyes kept wide through the deaths of night,
Sleepless nights and cursed by wights.
Fear of backstabs of my own breath,
Unforgivingly overthrown by my own health. 

Droplets of water that does not cease,
Ticking clock and heartbeat race.

These are the things that pales my face,
still NOTHING compared to you, Queen of my demise.

Limes squeezed on fresh new cuts?

Nails plucked and eyes thrown with darts?

No words can describe this true pain,
Love, you betrayed me, thus I am slain.

5 Minutes Break, 09Alpha!!!

Regardless the "show" these guys are putting up in here,
They are actually very bright and yes, top students!
I expect nothing less than being successful from these guys~
:D


Zero Nine Alpha,
Auuummm!!!

CADETSSS!!! WAKEY2!!!!!

Our beloved Warden Jeffrydin,
Everyday around 6 am,
He'll roam around all the cabins and ring the freaking bell (0:08) just a few centimeters from our freaking ears!!!
Well,
We're considered lucky if he does that.







There were a few occasions when he roams around with a Cricket BAT!!!!
guess what he does with that?

Boys will be boys,
you know how some of them sleep~

Let your imagination run wild!!
XD

"Love"

A poem  requested by special someone.





There are many ways for affection of love,
From loving another and to The One above.
The adrenaline of how strong it feels,
Making us hunger for chills and thrills.



There's no greater love than of a mother's,
Keeping us safe for countless hours.
Showered us with tender and care,
A bond that nothing could ever tear.



Tough love felt between the siblings,
Love-hate emotion that strengthens the links,
No matter how much they quarrel or fight,
From harm they'll protect, with all their might.


 
The bond that felt between the buddies,
Of raging dragons and hopping bunnies.
A winter's mitten and the first flower of spring,
That is what, true friendships bring.



The moment I see you, I know it's love,
I see butterflies flying and kissing doves.
I want to be the one you'll say goodnight to,
And wake up having my arms around you.



When we gaze into each other's eyes,
It feels like being in paradise.
Wishing you're mine for the rest of my days,
I love you, my dear, forever and always

U.

If you love me,
Find me.

Don't stop.










Colourful.................

Thank You.

Sincerely,
from the bottom of my heart.
I'd like to thank all those who came and put colours in my life.
Ahh.... the floods of memories,
I can't deny that the flashbacks are there...
but hey,
The memories are better than those "what if-s",right?
:)

Okeiiii,
Long story short,
I'm talking about my past...Them~

Hahaha,
not proud of it,
but they are the reasons, the rocks, the cements, that moulds of who I am today.
A better person, of course!
:)

Errr...
Where to start?
Ok,
The one that made the foundation of me~
:)
She's a petite and loveable gal...
Mysterious but energetic.
Caring but strict.
Strong but gentle.....
our first encounter?
She was a transfer student to our class.
With her long wavy hair,
covering her fair white skin,
she walked shyly into our class and smiled generously to everyone...
i was immediately attracted by that display~
:)
the rest of the story is only for me to recall!!!
She's the one that taught me how to treat a lady~
my words,
my actions,
my courtesy,
to differentiate the thin line between rude and flattering~
:)
She's still a close friend in my heart.
a gal that I'll respect...and care for always.

Urmm...
then,
yea,
This gal......

That juggled with my feelings like a pro~
hahaha!
broken,shattered,and mended countless times.
"~" <- p="">








This thing that i put at the back of my sentences,
that's from her.
Pressing "Enter" after a short sentence?
That's from her too.
It makes sentences easier to digest.

She's the one that makes me open up my creativity~
which created our "Lalaland".
Experiments with words,
loving songs with beautiful lyrics,
shared the sweet silence of nightsky lying on the roof....

I can never forget her facial reactions and cute gestures...
when i showed her the borderless night skies filled with stars...
she started dancing and twirled in awe under the beautiful constellations~

When we met our first snow,
which melted on her warm beautiful smile......
her pale lips when i held her life in my hands...
Shuppp!!!I've moved on~
:)
She...is no longer a somebody..or anybody....
but still,
a huge impact on my life.
Appreciate all that...
You made me able to tolerate with broken hearts and false reasonings~

Next??
urmm...
She's a sweet bubbly gal with the gullibility of an anime character~
sweetest smile u can imagine, with bigggg round eyes...
She taught me how to laugh,
how to express myself....

the *action* that makes people imagine thru words....
example:
*Smiled with me bitting the corner of my bottom lips*

how to melt a girl's heart...including hers..
:)
her voice when she says "Hel..loooow?" thru the phone still rings in my ears...
the laughter "ahh hhaaaa~!" that she said she loved me doing~
She was never shy to box u up in a serious conversation,
but always manage to escape the bitter exits with her contagious smile.
She's getting married soon!!!
wishing you the best,dear!!
You definitely deserve happiness more than anybody.

urmmmmm.....
then...
Her.
it's unfair for me to rant out of anger,right?
:)
no matter how you hate me,
you are still one of those who really changed me.
the only relationship that my family know of....

You?
you are the reason that i can materialize beautiful emotions,feelings into words...
You told me that my words can touch a person's heart and can alter a situation....
You open up your arms so that i can hold and lead you.....
You taught me the meaning of sacrifice for love.....
but....
I'm sorry...
some things were never meant to be....
no matter how hard we strived,
it just won't work.
it's not worth holding on.
tears were shed like there's no tomorrow.
shuppp!!!
Wishing and prayed hard for you to be able to forget me and move on....
I hope that you'll understand why am i doing this....to you...
Like you said, Ex-es can't be friends,right?

Thank you for the memories.....



NOW?
Her!!!

:)
She?
The girl next door~
The girl across the street, to be exact~
:)
A story that can only be directed in movies....
We never knew the existence of each other before.
hahhaa,
A forced love that turned out to be reciprocal...
Ok2,
we're supposed to be arranged...to be married?
sound corny,huh?
Arranged marriage....still exist in today's world...

It's a beautiful coincidence...i can hardly explain our situations now....
it's like this --->
we were told by our parents that we will be arranged to be married...respectively,of course.
BEHIND OUR BACKS!!!
Parents can be sneaky too,huh?
Now,
SOMEHOW,
We are contacting each other without our parents knowing!!
BUT
we starting contacting each other before we knew that we are going to be engaged!!
 hahhaa...
and....now?
something is definitely in the air~
:)the problem now is........
how to break the news to our parents???
(T.T)

She's the reason why i can still smile everyday...
She's the answer to my prayers.....
She's the purpose of me waking up everyday...
I want you to be my only and my last....
Love you unconditionally......
You are the author of my new book and my new chapters for the finale~
:)

My "Thank you"?
it's for all those who prepared me for her...
:)
Amen.